


Knife to Meet You!

by boneapptheteeth



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Bara Sans (Undertale), DFAB reader, F/F, F/M, Reader Is Not Frisk (Undertale), Self-Harm, Soulmates, almost non consensual sex, but no smut, just almost smut, um i almost wrote smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-20
Updated: 2019-04-20
Packaged: 2020-01-20 14:57:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18527395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boneapptheteeth/pseuds/boneapptheteeth
Summary: The group of monsters you had come to know quickly became your best friends, although, it was strange that you hadn't met one of the members of their friend group - Papyrus' brother. Too bad your inquiries of who he was led to an invitation to a dinner that made your anxiety levels skyrocket. This monster better be worth your inevitable panic attack.You weren't aware of how worth it the skeleton really was.





	Knife to Meet You!

 

It’d been a few months since you had met them, the monsters. Though, wording it like that sounded much more sinister than it actually was.

 

The particular monsters in question about were a group of rowdy individuals who were heavily intertwined with the crux of human-monster politics for some reason. You weren’t against the idea of monsters gaining the same rights and freedoms as humans in any amount (though you _were_ very frightened by them for a good while after their emergence from under Mt. Ebott) but you sometimes wondered why you had to be friends with the core of the monster rights movement. This included the King of Monsters, the former Queen of Monsters (though it seemed as if she would regain her previous title from the way the two goat monsters were getting closer… you shipped it), the former captain of the royal guard, the former royal scientist, the monster ambassador (who was an ADORABLE human child), and a skeleton who didn’t hold any sort of title (though, unofficially he was the mascot of monsters) but was so enthusiastic about life that he didn’t draw any less attention and acknowledgement from those around him.

 

How did you fit into this group? Well, the answer was simple; you didn’t. You had no idea why they invited you of all people to hang out time after time, why they integrated you into their tight-knit circle without a second thought. It wasn’t that you despised them or was ungrateful – you just never understood why a random human like yourself was worth their time. You literally met Undyne, the former royal guard, by chance and things took off from there. It was complete luck that you happened to be not lying around on your bed, eating chips watching videos on your laptop and instead had run out of milk and went out to buy more. Your life may have sounded sad but… well it was sad, which was why you were so confused about how you managed to make such great friends.

 

Amongst the chaos that was the friend group you were in, there was one thing that was odd – you had never met Papyrus’ brother. The lanky skeleton’s supposedly lazy, as Papyrus always described him, brother was very much a part of the wacky group but he was never present whenever you were around. Maybe he had a thing against humans? Or maybe it was just dumb luck that you hadn’t met him (or he could have seen a glimpse of you one day and ran away because he thought you were disgusting which was a funny yet incredibly depressing thought).

 

After realising how weird it was that you had never met this monster despite knowing his friends for such a length of time, you questioned several of them.

 

Undyne’s response was pretty uninformative;

 

“OH YEAH, you haven’t Sans yet have you, Punk? You’ll meet him eventually; the asshole is always lurking around somewhere…”

 

Alphys’ response was even _more_ uninformative somehow, and you couldn’t understand half of what she was saying due to her excitement. Though, you did find her odd habits hilarious;

 

“S-Sans? Oh! You haven’t met him, w-well I suppose he _is_ a busy monster… Why are you asking? Are you possibly interested in him? Is this going to be like ananimewherethegirlmeetsthemysteriousguyandhefallsinlovewithherbutshe’sshybuthisloveovercomesthatandhe _finally confesses_ his feelings andthenTHEY KISS?? Oh. S-Sorry.”

 

You had really thought that Papyrus would be able to shed some light of the mystery that was his brother, but he got distracted by the absurd fact that you had apparently never verbalised your friendship. Poor baby! You thought it was a given after all this time; 

 

“MY BROTHER? OF COURSE, THAT NUMBSKULL! I CAN’T BELIEVE HE HASN’T MET UNDYNE’S AWESOME HUMAN FRIEND. A-And My Awesome Human Friend If You Are Alright With Me Calling You That. Huh? OF COURSE I’M GREAT, HOW COULD ANYONE THINK OTHERWISE, HUMAN _FRIEND_! NYEH! I AM STILL ASTOUNDED BY THE FACT THAT SANS HASN’T MET SUCH A GREAT HUMAN SUCH AS YOURSELF, THAT LAZYBONES BETTER PICK UP HIS SLACK… AND HIS SOCK!” after that, you had paused in your investigations to spend a meaningful while hanging out with the precious, insecure bean.

 

Papyrus had hinted that Sans and the queen were pretty close (‘VERY CLOSE’ he said suspiciously as his sockets squinted), and that prompted you to question her next. Her answer was probably the most helpful, though you still didn’t know much about the skeleton himself. Unfortunately, she slipped a few puns in the conversation;

 

“Oh my… I suppose Sans hasn’t been around too much lately, though we haven’t had a meaningful conversation recently I have a feeling he’s overworking himself again. That skeleton doesn’t know how to take a real break with _no body_ around to tell him to! Excuse me, perhaps I’m congested with puns without anyone around to tell them to, I’ve really _goat_ to get a hold of myself! …Though, getting back on topic, we do plan to have a dinner next week with everybody – perhaps you can attend as well! This is the first dinner we’ve had with everybody in a while and it’d be lovely if you could make it.”

 

And so, you were invited to the friend group’s dinner, more than a little nervous about it. Would you be intruding? Would you be annoying? Maybe you’d just feel excluded, like some sort of third wheel. Though it was true that you had known these monsters for several months, you usually only met with one or two of them at a time. It could be a completely different story with all of them at one table, their strong friendships outshining the newly-formed ones that you had with most of the members. And this Sans… you had the impression that he was lazy and couldn’t be assed to put effort into anything, but some of your friend’s comments had implied that he wasn’t lazy at all but rather hardworking. Would you get along with this character as well as you had gotten along with the others? Or maybe he would hate you… and then your new friends would hate you because their close buddy hated you… and then you would lose your friends…

 

Oh well, time to find out you guessed.

 

* * *

 

It was the day of the dreaded dinner. The day of death. You had probably sent Undyne a million texts about what you needed to wear, how you should act, should you bring anything, should you ask to go to the washroom if you need to go while we’re eating, should you just hold it in? What if you piss your pants! How would you even explain that??

 

You could practically hear the fish woman cackling over text, laughing at your expense. They were very serious questions! And after you told her just that she answered your questions; wear whatever you want, you could wear just your UNDERWEAR and no one would give a shit. Just act like you usually do, Punk, why’s that even a question? You don’t need to bring anything but your PUNY-ASS little HUMAN self, but you know what? I know you’ll worry anyways, so you can literally bring anything you want and everyone would be happy – bring in a FUCKING miniature CACTUS for all anyone cares… But if you wanna impress the new addition to your list of friends, Sans really likes greasy food. He’s a fucking SLOB, but he also doesn’t care too much about anything so don’t worry. And just fucking PEE. Or shit, humans are weird but we don’t judge. Well, I do a bit, just cause you’re all gross.

 

So that was why you were bringing a tin tray full of french fries to the dinner.  

 

Making your way to the door, you juggled the hot tin in your hands, putting one hand under it to make use of your other hand. Unfortunately, after two seconds, the hand holding the tray started burning like hell so you quickly grabbed the sides with both hands again, opting to knock the door using my elbow instead. You felt like an idiot. You probably looked like one too.

 

After two successive knocks with your weenis (hah), you heard a loud voice inside (“OH! SOMEONE IS AT THE DOOR! I HOPE IT’S THE NEWSPAPER HUMAN AGAIN, I WISH TO APOLOGISE FOR SCARING THEM AWAY WITH MY INTENSE GREATNESS!”) and a shuffling of feet before the door opened.

 

“Oh, hello friend! I am glad you could make it,” Toriel stool at the other side of the door, seeming a bit frantic, her paws fidgeting at her middle, “I have to apologise for cutting my greeting short as I need to get back to the kitchen, but we will have plenty of time to talk during dinner!” And with that she made her way back to the kitchen, the distant exclamation of “Frisk how many times must I stop you from picking at the food before it is finished? …Flirting will not help you in this case, my child – I do not care how cute you are.” following her departure.

 

Unsure, you stepped into the warm house, shoulders tense and left hand still burning from your slight fuck up. You’d probably been in this house too many times to count, but it felt different this time, as if it were the first time again. Not even four full steps in you heard rapid footsteps, followed by appearance of a grinning Papyrus.

 

“NYEHEH! I DO BELIEVE THIS MEANS I HAVE WON, UNDYNE!” came his booming voice before the blue woman in question came running in,

 

“Papyrus, you KNOW that I had to gently put Alphys down on the couch before I could catch up, you CHEAT.”

 

“NO CHALLENGE SHOULD BE ABLE TO THWART THE CAPTAIN OF THE ROYAL GUARD, I EXPECTED MORE OF YOU, UNDYNE!” Papyrus tutted.

 

“Shut up you weenie, you cheated and you know it.” She turned to you,

 

“Hey OTHER WEENIE, it’s about time you made it! I was one second away from running over to your house and making you come through brute force.”

 

“UNDYNE I THINK THAT’S HARDLY THE CORRECT PROCEDURE OF FRIEND-RECIEVING,” scolded the tall skeleton, “I BELIEVE RATHER THAN BRUTE FORCE, IT WOULD BE MORE PROPER TO INTICE THE HUMAN USING PUZZLES!”

 

Before the woman could respond and subsequently start another one of the two’s absurd conversations, a new voice joined the fray.

 

“hey guys, i’m always one for standing around but don’tcha think it’d be best to bring the human in the house? unless ya need a _femur_ minutes.” Another skeleton appeared, one that was also tall, but not as tall as Papyrus. He was rather large in width as well – though you couldn’t surmise how a skeleton could be chubby – and he wore low-maintenance, comfortable-looking clothes that hung off his frame… was that a grease stain?

 

“SANS! I WILL IGNORE THAT HORRID PUN IN FAVOUR OF INTRODUCING YOU TO OUR HUMAN FRIEND SINCE YOU HAVE OBVIOUSLY NEGLECTED TO DO SO YOURSELF IN THE LAST **4 MONTHS** THAT WE HAVE KNOWN HER.” And suddenly pure white eye lights were on you. And didn’t leave you for a few good solid seconds.

 

…did you have something on your face?

 

You averted your eyes and wiped at your face with your sleeve, your actions seemingly breaking Sans out of his weird trance.

 

“heheh, sorry about that – got distracted by the amazin’ smell comin’ from that tray ya holdin’. is my grease detector goin’ off?”

 

Papyrus stomped his foot, “NYEH! HUMAN HOW COULD YOU BETRAY ME? IT’S BAD ENOUGH SANS GOES TO THAT GREASE-TRAP OF A RESTAURANT AS OFTEN AS HE DOES, HE DOESN’T NEED EVEN MORE FILTH IN HIS BODY!”

 

“bro, you wound me. grillby’s is a prime location, just ask the dog squad.” The stout skeleton brought a hand up to his chest in mock hurt. There seemed to be steam rising from Papyrus’ skull.

 

“AT LEAST THE DOGS HAVE SOME MOTICUM OF CONTROL – ALL YOU DO THERE IS EAT THE HORRID FOOD THAT WILL SOMEDAY GIVE YOU HEART FAILURE WHILE THEY MOSTLY PLAY GAMES USING THOSE ODD COLOURFUL DISKS.”

 

“skeletons don’t have hearts, bro.”

 

“NYEH!”

 

“U-Um,” You spoke up, unsure about interrupting the brothers’ fight(?), “I’m not sure what’s going on, but I’m sorry for bringing these over. If you don’t want to eat them it’s alright, they were pre-packaged anyways.” you shifted your feet nervously.

 

Sans’ eye lights on you seemed to shrink for some reason, maybe he was actually mad?

 

Papyrus spoke up first, “NONSENSE! EVEN IF YOUR FOOD IS A GREASE-COVERED HEALTH RISK WE WILL STILL INDULGE IN EATING IT… WELL, SOME OF US WILL! AFTER ALL, IT’S FRIENDSHIP FOOD THAT YOU HAVE MADE FOR US, ISN’T IT?”

 

“Uh yeah, they’re fries. I’m not sure if they’re ’friendship food’ like your spaghetti, but I did fry them before I got here.”

 

“ah, geez, fries? You’re killing me…” you turned a curious gaze to Sans’ quiet comment, making eye contact with him again before being lifted off the ground by Papyrus and tucked under his arm. You panicked a little and attempted to hold out the tray in a way that it would not burn you or him.

 

“LET US PROCEED TO THE ROOM OF DINING!”

 

It was only then that you realised how quiet Undyne was being – really an anomaly – quickly glancing her way, you caught her looking at Sans, then at your smaller form, before a shit-eating grin grew on her face. Oh no. That smile never meant anything good.

 

And then you were carried off to your demise.

 

Or maybe not demise, but the site of your inevitably socially awkward explosion of embarrassment. You then saw the contents of the table and your stomach sank, sitting there was actual food. Not food like the fries you brought, but real food, like noodles and casseroles kinda food. Oh. Well you haven’t sat down and you’ve already embarrassed yourself. Who brings fries to a nice dinner? You, apparently.

 

Papyrus set you down on a chair, freeing you from his hard, bony hold.

 

He sat down in the chair next to your, and Undyne sat on your other side. By the time Sans made it to the table, he made the decision to plop down into the seat across from yours. Would have thought he would sit next to his brother, huh.

 

After you set down the fries, uncovered them, and balled up the tin foil (you were unsure where to put it so you stuffed it in your pocket in your awkwardness) Alphys peeked her head into the room and smiled in your direction when you spotted her, proceeding to sit next to Undyne. Honestly, those two were adorable. A small smile grew on you face as you watched the two nuzzled their noses together. So sweet that it was giving you cavities.

 

You realised after gushing about the cute couple beside me that someone was staring at you, you cautiously shifted your eyes towards the skeleton who sat in front of you. What greeted you was the most intense gaze that you were sure had ever landed on you. Sans’ eye lights were glowing, seeming to pierce your very soul with the way they bore into you. You squeaked in surprise and he chuckled lowly at your expense.

 

Why was that hot? Why did you find a guy you just met so hot??

 

And why was he staring at you so much? Did you do something wrong?

 

“Alright, dinner is done! I apologise for keeping you waiting, these last few dishes insisted on taking their time.” Toriel strides into the room followed by a bouncy Frisk, both their hands filled with dishes of food.

 

“MISS TORIEL, IF I MAY ASK, WILL THE KING BE JOINING OUR BOUNTIFUL FEAST THIS TIME AROUND?”

 

At Papyrus’ question, Toriel’s face scrunched up in distaste at the mention of the King of Monsters, “That old goat does not know how to make time for the people who care for him, he always insists that he has official business to take care of, but I presume he is simply running from his own problems.” She sighed, “Oh Gorey…” Toriel clapped her paws after setting down the ceramic dish that she had held,

 

“Well, let us not be disgruntled by Asgore of all people, he is a party pooper at times but we can certainly have fun without him. He _does_ have to deal with the _sit_ -y council’s hounding at this time as well.” concluded the goat monster as she sat at the table at the head next to Papyrus and slyly glanced in Sans’ direction, a paw over her mouth. For some reason, the look she gave the skeleton, filled with so much familiarity and affection, caused an unpleasant twinge in your chest.

 

The skeleton only chuckled and shut his eye sockets, “good one, tori.” The woman sent a concerned look his way before ruffling the hair of the impatient child beside her who pouted up at her.

 

“Yes, yes, child. We can now eat. Oh, and I see that our friend has brought more food to add to our selection! You must know by know how voraciously this bunch eats, so any addition is surely welcome.” You blushed a bit, averting your eyes. You supposed Toriel was already used to your insecure nature and was trying to soothe the worries you didn’t need to even express aloud, but despite knowing this, you were still unused to getting compliments (even though you could hardly describe that as a compliment) and felt flustered.

 

“I-It’s no problem! No problem at all, I just felt guilty not bringing anything since you invited me and all…”

 

“Nonsense! You are not obligated to bring anything, and you should know by now that you are always welcome anytime, dear friend.” Your blush intensified and you had the strong urge to cover your face, but only rubbed a hand across your face as to wipe away your embarrassing expression and looked away from the motherly goat. Your eyes coincidentally passed by Sans who was gripping his shirt, face tinted blue, and eye lights dilated. Was he okay? Maybe your previous deduction about Toriel and Asgore was less true than you thought from the way Sans looked, presumably at Toriel. Why were you so conscious of him? You subconsciously looked his way every few minutes.  

 

“Thanks Toriel… I’m glad to have met you all.”

 

“Oh shut it with the sappy shit, and let’s eat already!” Undyne slammed her fist onto the dinner table, and Toriel sent a glare her way at the cursing.

 

Papyrus patted the top of your head and sent you a look that was difficult to interpret before speaking, “WHILE I DO THINK THAT UNDYNE COULD HAVE USED BETTER WORDS TO DESCRIBE THE MOMENT THAT HAD JUST COME TO PASS, I THAT IT’S HIGH TIME THAT WE ALL STARTED PARTAKING IN THE DELICIOUS FOOD BEFORE US!” and with that, we started eating, though Frisk had already started stuffing their mouth as soon as soon as their mother had given them permission.

 

During the dinner, you were properly introduced to Sans. The skeleton had sent a wink your way when he made a pun about how he was a “humerus” guy, a joke that had caused Papyrus to start screaming and the rest of the table, save Toriel, to groan. You were caught between wanting to groan and giggle so instead a made an odd snorting-grunting sound in response that, oddly, made Sans’ grin hitch wider and his sockets to sparkle with mischief.

 

Throughout the night Sans continued to make horrible puns while shoveling down most of the fries and drowning them in a pool of ketchup. At first, Papyrus scolded his brother about how he should leave some of the fries for the rest of the dinner guests, but soon gave up when it was apparent he wasn’t making any headway.

 

You weren’t sure whether to be amused and annoyed at Sans’ puns or disgusted at his eating habits. You hated the way that the shorter skeleton would send you a triumphant look whenever he got you to snicker, so you tried harder to keep your laughter at bay, which caused him to pun even harder – it truly was a battlefield at the dinner table. All the while, your monster friends around you were holding amicable conversation about what they had been doing lately, and about random silly things such as “…MY SPECIAL ATTACK! I THOUGHT THAT MEDDLING CANINE WOULD HAVE WANDERED ELSEWHERE ON THE LARGE EXPANSE OF THE SURFACE BUT HE APPEARED AT MY LOCATION OF WORK AND HAD THE GALL TO SNATCH THE BONE I HAD MATERIALISED TO SHOW MY HUMAN COWORKER! I’M CERTAIN THEY WERE CRUSHED TO HAVE MISSED THE CHANCE AT WITNESSING MY ELEGANT MAGICWORK, POOR HUMAN! THEY WERE BENT OVER AT THE WAIST, TREMBLING, THEIR FACE RED WHILE THEY DESPERATELY TRIED TO HOLD IN THEIR CRIES OF ANGUISH WITH THEIR TINY HUMAN HAND – TRULY AN UNFORTUNATELY POSITION TO BE IN, MISSING THE GREAT PAPYRUS’ EQUALLY AS GREAT ATTACK!” or “No, I KNOW I can outmatch you at running more laps, we train every week and I beat you EVERYTIME… THAT ONE TIME WAS A FLUKE.” When they weren’t chatting about some random thing (most of those things being absolutely hilarious in nature, as always), they were trading suspicious looks while Sans filled the comfortable silence with quips and one-liners that were, of course, pun-y.

 

After dinner, you sat in satisfaction with your hand on your stomach and your eyes closed. Hearing the shifting of chairs cut through the cadence of the group’s conversations, you opened an eye to see Undyne and Sans walk out of the room.

 

“What’s that about?” you asked as you turned to Papyrus who had previously been caught up in a conversation with the monster ambassador.

 

“UNDYNE HAD ASKED MY BROTHER FOR A MOMENT TO SPEAK, I CAN’T IMAGINE THE REASON (I REALLY CAN, THOUGH. AUDIBLE WINK.).” Of course, Papyrus had said that last part out loud, in a mock whisper. Frisk, Toriel, and Alphys giggled while you only could send him a questioning glance. You didn’t know Sans too well so may it was something that you didn’t know about, something in his private life?

 

Her eyes squinted with glee, Alphys spoke through her claws that she had positioned over her mouth, “Y-yeah, don’t worry about it… Or do! That’s how it always happens in anime!”

 

What? “How what always happens?” Eyes widening, Alphys’ gaze darted away and she begins to fidget,

 

“NOTHING!”

 

“NYEH! ‘ _NOTHING_ ’ INDEED!” Papyrus, you could hear those quotation marks.

 

Across from the skeleton in the room Frisk burst out laughing, causing Toriel to snort beside them and apologise through her giggling.

 

What was even happening?

 

It was then that Sans and Undyne returned to the room, Undyne looking frustrated and Sans adorning a relaxed grin. His sockets found you and his mouth widened even further.

 

“whatcha’ guys talkin’ about? sharin’ some juicy gossip?” Sans questioned while reaching over to the carton of juice in the middle of the table to pour a glass of juice.

 

“BROTHER! WE WERE TALKING ABOUT YOU, AS A MATTER OF FACT.” Papyrus smiled deviously, obviously ignoring his brother’s pun, “TELL US, WHAT WERE YOU TWO SPEAKING ABOUT?”

 

The shorter skeleton glanced at you for a second before returning his gaze to his brother, “’dyne was just asking about something she wasn’t too sure about.”

 

“AND WHAT WAS THIS SOMETHING, PRAY TELL?” Papyrus inquired, but he was only met with his brother’s snores, Sans seeming to melt into his seat in his spontaneous nap, “UGH, SANS!”

 

“Yeah, all Sans did was deflect my questions too, like a WEENIE.”

 

“Umm” you started, “Is it too much to ask what this is about?” They all turned back to you.

 

“Well, PUNK, your Sans’-“

 

“H-Honey, I don’t t-think that’s for you to say…” Alphys interrupted her girlfriend with a clawed hand on her shoulder, and even though the exchange was curious, my attention was caught by the supposedly sleeping skeleton who had his sockets wide open again, but within them held no eye lights. The look he directed at Undyne was less than friendly. You shivered in discomfort.

 

“Yeah, sorry Al, just got carried away.”

 

And that was the end of that discussion.

 

* * *

 

Later that night at Toriel’s, you had exchanged phone numbers with Sans, the skeleton saying something about how ‘you better not have given me a phone-y, or i’ll do a number on you.’ You had grit your teeth at his puns, as to not give him the satisfaction of getting a laugh out of you. Though, your effort was in vain since you had burst out laughing when you took his offered hand in a hand shake and a loud, wet fart burst through the air. Once he revealed the whoopee cushion, you were completely gone, body shaking in your hysterics. Sans’ wide smile looked to almost split his skull apart and Papyrus’ frustrated ‘SANS!’ only egged on your uncontrollable laughter. You left that night chest filled with more joy than you had ever remembered feeling, and a new number in your phone with the contact name ‘sansational ;)’.

 

Soon after, Sans had seamlessly become a large part of your life. He texted you constantly, ran into you on the streets, hung out with you at your house, and was usually there when his brother invited you to their house. It was as if he had always been a part of your life, something you had been missing and, now that you had it, you could never do without his presence in your days. You couldn’t help but care deeply for the skeleton, couldn’t help but cuddle closer, or spill out your guarded thoughts, or hang on to every word he said. In short, you were boned. You were so deep in your feelings for the monster when you realised those feelings even existed, you couldn’t possibly let go of such an amazing person and forget the emotions he made you feel. You knew you could never shake off your crush on him; but he’d never like back someone like _you_. You were just… not enough and he was so much more. He was the whole package, just everything anyone would want and you were all the scraps of what could never be a filling meal. The way he smiled lit up a room, his comforting touches that never failed to ease your tensions, his assuring words when you made a mistake, the kind way he accepted you, and the dumb jokes he made to bring a smile to your face. Sans was just… he was so _good_.

 

What should you do?

 

It would hurt so much to see him with someone else, but you knew it was a matter of time until someone snatched him up and gave him all the love he deserved, and you needed to prepare yourself to support him with all your heart.

 

Too bad a small part of that heart had him in it, you didn’t know how to make him leave.

 

You always resorted to old bad habits in your low times, reluctant to bother other people with your insignificant problems and instead coped in different ways – no matter how dumb those ways were.

 

* * *

 

The first time he saw you his soul almost tugged out of his chest.

 

It was like a lethal zap to his system, lightning in every fibre of his being. Molten lava flowing through his marrow, he almost groaned at the way your voice had soothed down the loud sensations in his bones, calmed the violent burning into a warm flow of contentedness like sun-touched waves washing up on a shore. He wanted to touch you so bad, pull your tiny human body to his bony one and envelop you in his protective embrace. He wanted to hide you away and never let you get hurt.

 

He knew what was happening, all monsters knew what this intense feeling was. Of course, he’d never experienced it before and never thought he would.

 

Soulmates.

 

All monsters were told of soulmates when they were little. Though, it served as more of a fairy tale story, something to light up the eyes of children rather than inform them of what was to come. They were told that, when you met your soulmate, your soul would be inexplicably drawn to theirs, that holding back your soul from joining with theirs would be incredibly painful. This person that your soul desperately wanted to be with was the one person that was made for you, the only being that would mirror your very being. This wasn’t to say that you couldn’t be compatible with someone else, but your soulmate was the only one that naturally clicked with you with little effort, that you were drawn to so strongly that your soul threw away logic when it came to being with your destined.

 

Though, soulmates were rare, so rare that only a handful of them had found each other after the barrier had been erected and monsterkind was trapped Underground. On the surface… well, so far, he hadn’t heard of any soulmate pairings, but that could’ve have just been because it was harder to hide things in the small Underground.

 

Now that Sans had found his soulmate, well, he’d never let you go; that was for damn sure.

 

He’d heard that, in soulmates, the initial connection was really the least important and that getting to know your soulmate as a person was the best part of everything. And though he’d just met you, he was already falling in love with your personality.

 

He loved how cute and small you were, your low confidence worrying but endearing in a strange way. His soul clenched painfully when he watched you flush in embarrassment at Toriel’s compliments, a blue blush coating his skull at how adorable you were. He just wanted to whisk you away to his house and bond you. How could he resist his beautiful, charming soulmate toting one of his favourite foods?

 

Though, of course he didn’t do that because, even if you were soulmates, that was highly inappropriate and invasive. Didn’t mean that his bones weren’t rattling with the effort to hold himself back. Later, he thought about how maybe he was having such a hard time controlling himself due to his paranoia of another reset, losing you and your light in the process. He wasn’t one to psychoanalyse himself usually, but he did admit he had some issues and things he needed to sort out. He hoped his baggage didn’t negatively affect you in any way.

 

When Sans realised how cute your stubborn attempts to refrain from laughing at his jokes were, he dialed up his efforts to make you break your poorly maintained façade. Everything but you and him faded away when he talked to you at that table, he didn’t know it could be like this, he didn’t know he could feel so whole from just talking with his soulmate.

 

He should have known that every monster at the table – and Frisk, though they probably just noticed he was acting weird – would realise what was going on. Sans was usually an observer, someone who would quip and joke or slip in a comment at the right time. He didn’t typically take an active role in a group conversation unless he had to, and preferred to sit back and soak in the atmosphere. He was a relaxed, lazy, and generally low-effort. In this case, though, he was afraid that if he lost your attention that he would never get it back, that your gorgeous eyes would never meet his eye sockets ever again. Realistically, that was unlikely, but the soulmate connection was doing weird stuff to his soul – his brain (or lack thereof) couldn’t keep up.

 

He was afraid that you’d lose interest in him and he’d lose a big star in his sky, a star that he’d just discovered. Well, he was afraid and he just liked talking to you. It was hard not to like you, and he understood why Undyne befriended you so quickly. Sure, there were so many humans that she could have picked instead, but you were a beacon, someone with a soul that you didn’t even have to pull out to sense. Your soul gave off waves of acceptance and love, prompting the people around you to naturally open up to you and put their trust in your small hands. There was none of the hesitance in you that he saw in many other humans; there was no fear or judgement. You didn’t pause for a moment like the others, only to move on after the excitement of monsters died down. You stopped and accommodated people into your life, making them part of the stream that you travelling down.

 

He may have just met you, but your soul was an open book, a book with words of insecurity and sorrow as well as compassion and love. He wanted to erase the sadness from your life and fill it with only joy.

 

When Sans heard that his brother and all their friends had befriended a human, he was honestly skeptical. Monsters were fairly new on the surface, and humans hadn’t completely adjusted to the idea of sharing the Earth with another sentient species. Sans didn’t hate humans or anything, but he knew that it was best to be cautious around them as they were unpredictable. There had been many times where he’d hear about an encounter Papyrus had with a human trying to take advantage of him, of course his brother could take care of himself so Sans was minimally worried when he heard of these occurrences, but the stories he heard along with events in the news about things humans had done really put a skeleton on guard. Sans had had run ins with bad-intentioned humans as well (as a monster, it was a given, unfortunately), but due to his guarded and closed-off nature, he found himself in less trouble than many of the warmer and accepting friends around him. So, hearing about a human joining his circle of friends… he didn’t really bother meeting them since he figured they would be gone soon.

 

Now he was kicking himself for his reluctance to introduce himself to you. He could have met his soulmate so much sooner, maybe he could have been in a relationship with you already. You could have been _his_ by now, but you weren’t, due to his idiocy.

 

That was the thing with humans, as far as he knew they couldn’t feel the bond. Humans were souls encased in flesh, physical matter. They were more matter than magic. They were so out of touch with their souls that they mistook the desires of the soul as passing feelings that were to be ignore. Humans were creatures of the mind, while monsters were creatures of the soul. I fact, monsters _were_ their soul, they were a projection of what their soul stood for and wanted. That was why, when monsters felt their soul tell them something, they felt it with their whole being.

 

Sans had to take it slow with you, ease you into the idea of being with him, and eventually tell you that the two of you belonged to each other after the soulmate connection strengthened enough for you to get attached to him. It sounded a bit manipulative, but it really was the safest route.

 

When you exchanged phone numbers with Sans, he finally shattered your act of remaining unfazed by his jokes with his classic whoopee cushion prank. Your loud laughs made pure affection and pride bloom in his soul and he was even more sure that he could never let you go at that moment.

 

You were a star, shining bright, almost fading but refusing to die out. You grew stronger and brighter and you bathed everyone around you in your light.

 

Sans was addicted, infatuated, obsessed.

 

He couldn’t help but spend all the he could with you in the coming days. He texted you as often as he could – sending bad puns and stupid memes, he would run into you on the street (both on purpose and not on purpose. One of the great things about a soulmate connection was the fact that it subconsciously brought you together once you had found each other, the established link from simply meeting irreversible and binding), he would hang out with you and eventually earned the right to hang out with you at your house, and he would stick around when his brother invited you other to their house (having you in his territory was blissful). Being around you brought a happiness to his soul that he had never experienced, but it was also torturous.

 

Sans couldn’t help but crave physical touch from you constantly, always touching your arms, or cuddling you into his torso, or nuzzling into you. Despite the fact that you grew a vibrant shade of crimson that turned his bones into a warm mush, you stayed oblivious. No matter how intimate he got with you. And Sans really pushed the line, his control thin despite the fact that he was known for his careful and controlled nature. He really couldn’t complain about the soulmate stuff, but damn it could be a pain sometimes.

 

Especially when you squished so close to him, your soft skin on his firm bones, your neck so close he could lean in and take a bite. It was maddening, and it was torturous to his libido. He wasn’t a sexual monster, but he supposed that was changing now that he had a soulmate. He could barely hold back from pouncing on you most days, his new familiarity with you making him develop an appreciation for not only your personality but your body. Stars know that he often fantasised about taking you like how he wanted.

 

An odd thing about monsters was their instinctual nature. Humans grew out of relying on animal instinct, and instead logically thought everything through, yet monsters couldn’t completely evolve out of that mindset. For the most part, monsters were just as rational as humans, but there were certain situations where they acted more territorial or possessive. An example was monster heats. It was pretty self-explanatory what that entailed for the most part, and he prayed that he’d be together with you before he entered his yearly heat… the last thing he wanted to do was force himself on you and consequently scare you off.

 

The two of you had been close friends for a while now, Sans often times at your place. He hated to be so impatient, but his soul was constantly screaming at him to bond with you already, and it was driving him insane. He was constantly close to snapping around you, but, if it made you happy and comfortable, he’d wait forever.

 

* * *

 

Sans walked into your house, excited to surprise you.

 

He’d cancelled a meet-up with you earlier that day because his manager had informed him that they were was understaffed and begged the monster to work longer than he was assigned to in order to handle a large shipment that was coming in. Sans was not obligated to work overtime, and was tempted to refuse his manager’s request, but that job was one of the ones that payed more. Monsters didn’t generally get many employment opportunities, much less a good pay. Even if they managed to get a job with a decent wage, there was still a high likelihood of facing discrimination; especially if it was a customer service job. Sure, he wasn’t treated like a god or anything at that place (not that he wanted that, it’d probably make him uncomfortable, in fact), but he was treated decently with more than decent pay. He and Papyrus were short on cash most often, and he couldn’t afford to lose one of his better jobs. So, he had texted you hastily and regretfully, saying that he couldn’t meet you for your scheduled hang out.

 

God, was he annoyed out of his mind that he couldn’t spend time with his soulmate. He didn’t spend enough time with you in the first place, in his opinion.

 

Luckily, one of the big machines at his workplace got stuck partway through, making it impossible to process the shipments that had come in. Of course, with his background in engineering, Sans could have easily spent a few hours fixing the rust bucket – but how could he do that when his manager groaned and stated that Sans could leave since not much could be done. That meant he could spend the rest of the day cuddling with his soulmate!

 

Opting to pleasantly shock you instead of texting you the good news, Sans immediately took a shortcut to your place with a giant grin.

 

Walking further into your house, he heard a faint humming. Your voice was sweet and smooth, never failing to send a shiver through his bones. Though this time, your voice sounded cracked and quiet. He stopped his journey through your house in front of your bathroom door. His soul pushed him forward slightly when he heard the tune the flowed from your lips pause to allow the sound of a sharp intake of breath to echo through the small room you were in.

 

Sans wasn’t sure what was happening. He didn’t know what to make of what he was hearing yet… there was a terrible feeling in his soul.

 

Soon, your humming resumed once more – happier and lighter this time – and he heard the sound of the tap running and shutting off. There were light footsteps and then the door opened, your face crashing into his chest in your failure to notice his presence.

 

He was frozen, his eye lights extinguished.

 

You looked up at him, eyes wide and face flushed, “O-Oh! Sans! I thought you weren’t coming anymore. I-I- what are you doing here? Hahaha!” you took a step back and hid your arms behind your back. But he already saw.

 

He saw the fresh red lines on your delicate forearm, and the small knife that was clutched in your other hand.

 

He should have known. He should have known! He was your fucking s o u l m a t e. What kind of soulmate was he when he couldn’t even tell when his mate was distressed?! He was **pathetic**.

 

“how long.”

 

Your smile became even more crooked, arms reflexively hiding further behind your back.

 

You took another step back, “W-What?” Sans stepped forward and forcefully grabbed your shoulders, a growl growing in the back of his throat.

 

“h o w  l o n g. how long have you been hurting, and i never noticed? how long have i  f a i l e d  as a mate to care for you?” his grip started to get painful.

 

You looked into his empty sockets, scared of him for the first time since you’d met him. Your heart hammered in your chest, did he _see_? Did he see your shame, the result of everything in you that was ugly? Was he going to leave you now? You’d tried so hard to hide it… wearing long sleeves around your friends, and smiling as much as you could. Now, one of your best friends was going to leave you right after you’d started getting close, just because you were a disgusting human being.

 

You quivered in his hold, bringing a hand to his forearm when his fingertips started digging into your flesh unbearably hard.

 

“S-Sans? A-Are you o-okay? What are you t-talking about? M-Mate???”

 

It just so happened that the arm you brought up was the one that you had just marked, the red lines bubbling with fresh blood that was on precipice of spilling down your limb. The cuts were weaved between old scars that had healed overtime, the white lines barely visible in the face of the attention-grabbing scarlet.

 

Sans growled, the sound and vibration of it sending a thrill through your body. His empty sockets narrowed on your wrist and he grabbed let go of a shoulder to grab at the now revealed arm.

 

“you’re hurting yourself, because i failed to make you happy. this is _my_ fault. you’re gonna leave me. you _can’t_.” his low, growly tone ripped through the air. You tried to pull your arm back when he brought it closer to his skull, afraid of someone seeing the result of your shame for the first time. The skeleton was too strong, however, and he sniffed at your injuries and brought a tongue out. This was the first you had seen his cerulean tongue, it appeared jelly-like in texture and had more flexibility than one a human would have. The appearance of the glowing appendage made your fear spike, though it was mixed in with a newly blossomed arousal that confused you. Sure, you thought that your skeleton friend was charming, attractive, _hot_ ; but you’d never felt like _that_ before.

 

Sans chuckled as he trailed his tongue up your arm, lapping up the ruby liquid that was gathered. You hissed at the sudden sting and Sans’ left eye lit up, a large blue pupil filling his formerly empty socket. Magic floated up from the new addition to his skull, dissipating into the air at it trailed away.

 

“ **i won’t let you leave me.** ”

 

The knife that was in your other hand clattered to the floor as your crush suddenly pulled your body flush against his, dwarfing you with his size. You squeaked when he slammed his teeth to your lips painfully. You started struggling, pushing his away, but he didn’t budge. And after a few seconds of his mouth on yours, you melted, body going lax against his. This was… wrong, inappropriate, sexual harassment! Then why did it feel so good?

 

His teeth against your lips were strangely soft, having a slight give against your skin. Sure, it didn’t have the same pliability as human lips, but you felt something you were sure was magic making the whole experience pleasurable. The magic wasn’t invasive, but… prompting, it was a suggestion that you latched on to. You should have felt so violated by the lack of consent, instead, you desperately took the opportunity to be intimate with your crush. Your emotions were all over the place, and you weren’t completely sure what was happening; much less the feelings you were experiencing at that moment.

 

You moaned as he dipped a hand to your waist, massaging and groping, and used his tongue to lick your lips. Your surprised exhalation was all his needed to dip his magic appendage into your mouth. He groaned and explored the inside of you.

 

 ** _Finally_**. Sans had been waiting to devour you like this for what seemed like forever. The taste of you was sublime, and your sounds… god, he wanted to bond you right there and then. And he would. He would do it so you couldn’t attempt something stupid and leave him, he finally found you and he’d be damned if he let you go.

 

Everything in him was screaming ‘ ** _CLAIM HER._** ’, his bones were rattling in his desperation and he couldn’t help but drop his hands to your hips, trailing his phalanges up your shirt to grip your bare skin. You were so soft. _His_.

 

At the felling of his bare bones on the sensitive skin of your waist, you whimpered. Sans growled at the sound and ground into you, connecting his pelvis to yours roughly.

 

You squeaked, was that… was that a…?!

 

Pulling your mouth from his, string of saliva connecting your mouths, you lifted your freed arms to Sans’ chest, trying to push his off with no avail. His skull followed your lips, his eyes lidded. You moved a hand to cover his teeth and he grumbled in displeasure.

 

“S-Sans! Sans, no, I can’t!” he nipped and licked at your fingers, single eye light trained on your wide pupils. At your refusal to react positively, he thrusted his hips once more, and purred at your exclamation of surprise.

 

“N-No! Please… I…” tears stated streaming down your face, vision blurred by the liquid in your eyes. You shut your eyes at the uncomfortable feeling of an excess of tears, hiccupping.

 

You noticed after a moment that Sans’ grip loosened, arms coming around you to cradle your small body in his. He cooed and whimpered, nuzzling his teeth into your hair. You were flooded with a warm, soothing feeing against what felt like your soul. Your arms that were trapped in between your bodies relaxed and you leaned into his touch.

 

A gasp escaped you when he suddenly lifted you in his arms in a bridal carry, holding you close to his chest. Your face was pushed into his neck, so you weren’t sure where he was taking you until he sat down on something soft and settled you down gently in his lap.

 

The two of you were on your couch, Sans’ skeleton arms around you, pulling you firmly to his ribs and legs crossed beneath you. His face was buried in the side of your head and purrs escaped him, vibrating his bones, and by extension, your body. You were confused, but you were so relaxed and cozy that you couldn’t help but go limp in his hold, breathing starting to even out and eyes drooping.

 

“sorry.”

 

You blinked your eyelids in an attempt to stay awake, voice coming out lazy,

 

“S’kay. I mean it’s not, and I dunno what’s goin’ on, but I trust you Sans.”

 

His purrs started getting louder, he shifted his hold on you. His nuzzles weren’t helping you in your efforts to not fall asleep.

 

“it’s probably the bond making you feel like that.”

 

“Bond?” you questioned.

 

“sorry i didn’t tell you sooner; didn’t wanna scare you off. we’re soulmates, our souls were made for each other.”

 

You would question the existence of soulmates later, when you were able to function better, “How long d’ya know?”

 

“ever since we met,” he chuckled, “you were so beautiful – still are.”

 

You hummed to let him know you heard him, slipping further and further into sleep.

 

Before you lost consciousness, you registered Sans speak once more, “sleep. i’ll explain everything better when you wake up. i know i was a total ass, but i’ll definitely make it up to you, starlight.”

 

You slipped into a calm sleep, warm and content in your soulmate’s hold, unaware that you really _would_ make him work for your affections once you woke up.

**Author's Note:**

> oh wow that's... long. how did that get so long??? this was supposed to be smut, but i feel like it didn't really fit in with the mood of this fic soo... here's an unsatisfying ending! sans just cares about you a lot. 
> 
> i feel like, when people write self-harm stories on this site, it turns out to be overly dramatic. like, my experience with self-harm was pretty casual. not to say it was healthy, just, it wasn't as emotional as a lot of people make it out to be. which is okay - people have different experiences. just, mine wasn't like that. 
> 
> hope you enjoyed! here's my tumblr: https://bone-app-the-tea.tumblr.com/


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